Thursday, March 29, 2012

A love eight relationship





Here it is, the anniversary post. No matter how behind I get on this blog I do not like to miss a chance to shout to the world how much I love Curtis, for reals.


Here is my top eight things I love about the Laysh:


8. his dimples and blue eyes.


7. his smarts, he always knows the answers to my questions and jeopardy? Forget about it.


6. the sense of humor of this man CAN NOT BE BEAT.


5. boy does he take me on some sweet trips, he may text me after spending two dollars at 7-eleven but I really can't complain when I am averaging two Hawaii trips a year.


4. he sticks up for me and loves me. At the end of the day I am his number one.


3. when I am sad he wants to fix whatever is making me feel that way, while it does not always work I appreciate his effort.


2. he loves loves loves Deacon. Reads him chapter books, takes him to Holiday Oil with a quarter to buy a airhead and tells him he loves him 10 times a day.


1. he lets me be me, encourages me to do things I love and wants me to have a fun, happy life.


Happy anniversary Curtis, I am shocked and thrilled you did not do anything WEIRD to your face! I love you so much.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

She is taking too long

Listen, I do not know when this blog became all about my struggles. Swear it, I used to be fun, I think I still am! Hopefully if you know me in real life (if you don't know me who are you?? tell me please!) you still think I am kinda fun? Yes?

Today I was leaving a pretty important doctors appointment with Deacon and my mom from the back seat Deacon sighed and said "Mom, we are never going to get a baby" I said, "You don't think so?" he then replied "she is taking too long." Woof. What a punch in the gut, it is taking a long time, I just thought I was the only one who noticed.

Growing up with siblings is all I ever imagined and all I knew, what fun is childhood if you get everything you desire and have no one to fight with? Just kidding, I know there is lots of advantages to being a only child, probably lots of really smart people can tell me all the pros instead of the cons I have in my head. I know that Deacon is having a happy life, we do have a happy life, full full full of fun, adventures, love and life. BUT. where would I be without these people: bossy big sister, house elf brother, annoying little sister and scrawny younger brother?
That is my childhood.

I can hope that Deacon one day will have: much wanted and desired younger brother or sister.

My personal struggle with conceiving has brought me a deeper understanding and love for those who struggle and not just in the same way I am. It has also brought me a genuine love and happiness for those who get what they are after. Truly. I am a different girl than I was two years ago.

I am happy to be that different girl, and I am not mad, sometimes sad but I know that I am not forgotten, I have said that before but so often I am reminded that I am so loved.

AND now that you made it through this post you get a good story as a reward! My work used to be a food bank of some sort so every once in awhile someone wanders in looking for it. The other day a man dressed like a woman came in, I kindly directed them to the new location. After he walked out the door Deacon said "Why is that boy like a grill?" Oh baby! SO glad that was after he left. HA!