Tuesday, May 28, 2013


In October or so we moved Deacon to a big bedroom downstairs to make room for the new babe. I was not worried that he would be scared or sad I knew he would be excited about the change. Deacon is such an adaptable kid, for that I am thankful. However, every big change deserves a gift right? He had been asking for a Dreamlight, he had seen it on T.V. and knew the little jingle that went with the commercial and it seems like the perfect security blanket for the big change.
Here is is with his puppy Dreamlight

For the last 8 months I have turned the dreamlight on as I leave the room. Three nights ago he told me he did not need it anymore. WHAT! WHY! SOB! 

He is so grown up, it feels like it is slipping by. If only I could stop time for just awhile, soak up his sweetness, his desire to be friends with everyone, his hugs, kisses and spontaneous "I love you's" Tomorrow is his last day of kindergarten. One year done. I know all my posts are about crying as of late, but what do you want me to do??

Time, it is a flyin' by. 

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Cry it out.

                                                            First day of Pre School
                                                            First day of Kindergarten

I find myself caught in a moment at least once a day thinking about Deacon. He is so close to nearing the end of kindergarten. I have said it before and I will say it again, HOW??!!

I feel so strongly that God sent me Deacon to ease my pain, soothe my soul and bring me much happiness in the face of hardships. Deacon has been so delightful to me. I can not say enough how much love I have for my first born son.

I see him growing, changing and losing a little bit of his place in the spotlight of our family. There is not much you can do about that, new baby usually means a new star of the show for awhile (and we love our new star)  all this seems just fine with Deacon but it leaves me with a little ache in my heart.

Next year my boy will spend more hours at school then he will spend with me (awake at least) and while I truly know this is the best thing for him, he loves school, he loves his friends and he does so well I can't help but want to steal him away and keep him home with me forever.

I took donuts to his school class for his birthday, he was so proud of his mom, could not wait to see me and say hi to the baby. The thought came to me " I wonder how much longer he will let me bring donuts on his birthday?" When do they turn into teenagers who want to sleep all day and smell weird?

So Deacon, I want you to know you can count on me to bring donuts to your class as long as you please. Lets make a deal, just until 10th grade?

So like the title states, I will most likely need to cry it out in the near future.

I love you Deacon.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

A very happy day

I love being a mom. It is the most rewarding thing I have ever done. The only thing I really dislike about being a mom is bloody noses. Deacon gets so many freaking bloody noses. Other than that is truly is wonderful. I feel so happy to take care of these darling kids. My favorite things in no particular order:

Seeing Gwen's face in the morning when I come in to get her from her crib seeing the good morning song ("good morning! good morning! how'd ya get so big? good morning, good morning! How'd ya get SO big? You are my little baby, soon you'll be a big girl! Good morning, good morning! How'd ya get so big!")

Volunteering in Deacons class. One of the best parts of my job is the flexibility. This allows me to go to Deacons class at least once a week, I LOVE seeing him in his own environment.

Celebrating birthdays and holidays. This past week was Deacons birthday (more on my 6 year old later!) and it was so fun to see his face when he came into our room in the morning. I love making memories I know my children will look back on fondly.

Dressing Gwennie and combing her pretty soft hair. I love having a girl, I hope she always knows how beautiful she is to me.

When Deacon makes me laugh, in the car yesterday I handed him a tortilla chip (from lone star, yum) and he said " I can't even handle how delicious these are!" He is always making me laugh.

Going through the drive through at Shivers getting a diet coke and a kids twist cone for Deacon. It may seem silly but it is a little ritual we have and I love it.

I love my kids, I am so happy to have them. Now excuse me while I go peek on them in their beds and cry, just kidding. Kinda.

AND before I go! I love my moms, Mom, Dana and Sharon. Happy mothers day!